Of Exams and Reviews
Friday, April 7th, 2006This was quite an experience… i just had to write it down…
I had to take an exam a week ago and naturally I had to study for it… hehehe… I realized that my study habits have not changed at all… master crammer pa rin… hehehe… i came to realize that working students should really be admired… its not easy to study after a long day’s work… you’d rather watch TV or sleep (in my case, add eat… hehehe) rather than pick up that book and review… i think it requires real commitment and focus… na HINDI MADALING GAWIN… hehehe…
The night before the exam, I went to the adoration chapel of the Edsa Shrine to pray that I may do well the next day… but I was also very anxious… to pass the exam was important to me… but I felt it was important to my pride than anything else… and i didnt think that was a very noble reason… people had far more pressing problems than that… so i didnt know what to tell Him… except that His will be done… and pray for his blessing and grace…
As usual right before an "important" event, i had trouble sleeping… as my usual style… I still read my reviewers and other parts of the book i had not paid much attention to… finally got to sleep around 1 or 130… woke up around 5… started on my reviewers again… my sister actually thought I didnt sleep… ("haller… ano kala mo sa akin?" was my answer… hehehe…)
While taking the exam, i felt that i had not studied enough.. i shouldnt have watched TV that much… I should have devoted more time to studying… tsk,tsk,tsk… I felt i would have done better… and of course that nagging fear that I may not make the cut… 70% to pass… I was sure of only 50% of my answers… maybe even less… my head was pounding already… i had not taken my breakfast yet (it was already 1pm) and i was riding on less than 4 hours of sleep… so when I had to click on the icon that will show whether I passed or failed… i took some time to pray… (the kind man at my back also told me to do so… God Bless him… I hope he passed his exam too…) … Your will Lord… if i dont make it… it will be a very humbling experience… if I pass… all credit is Yours Lord…
Moment of Truth: click… the screen reads.. Congratulations you passed the test!!! _(rating here)_ % Wow… for a few seconds there… I couldn’t move literally… i was overcome with relief… "Congratulations, mataas ah…" - sabi ng proctor (for the record: nde po mataas… sabi nya lang un… alam nya kasi na sobra ang nerbyos ko… hehehe… kaya basta pumasa, mataas na… hehehe) her words brought me back… "Thank you po" - that was all I managed to say… ("Thank God, magpamisa ka ha…" - the kind man at my back told me again..) "Opo, thank you Lord talaga" was my reply.
I’d rather not get into the details of the "events" that followed… as these involved some tears shed, a group hug at the middle of an office lobby and numerous calls and texts to family and friends.. hehehehe…
I met my sister and my best college bud (who had his cousin with him) for a late lunch… i was more than willing to shoulder the bill… (early celebration na ito… hehehe) and of course i just had to share my exam experience with them… my friend then rolled his eyes and told me… (this is not in verbatim) "Ganyan ka naman palagi e… feeling nde papasa… pumapasa naman… nothing new there…" And his cousin said (good naturedly) something like … "don’t you just hate it when people say that and they not only pass but end up getting a high score?" (ok… connivance na ito ng magpinsan… i paid the bill pa nyan ah… hahaha…)
Their remarks brought back high school and college memories… i really used to say that after some (most?!) of my exams… and i remember my mom actually told me that some people may take it the wrong way… thinking back… i think some people may have felt i really didnt mean it… :( but for the record.. i never say that if i think i had a good chance of passing… minsan naman alam mo na papasa ka d b? meron naman exams na madali talaga… pero minsan ako mismo nagugulat kapag andyan na ang results… swerte lang talaga manghula… hehehehe… at syempre God’s grace… 
Yun na… yan na ang kwento ko… i hope people won’t mind the abrupt switch from English to Tagalog or vice versa… i hope the ellipsis dont bother them too… i basically wrote down what came to mind… didnt pay much attention to grammar either… hehehehe… and some details were purposely omitted… hahahaha…
